The Worst Cold Call Opening Line Ever

My phone rings.

Me: “Hello?”

Cold Caller: Long pause from automated dialler… “Hello. Is this Eva Colbert?”

Me: “Yes it is.”

Cold Caller: “Hello Ms. Colbert. How are you today?”

SERIOUSLY?!

Ice Ice Baby 🎶

We’ve all been cold called.

But the worst cold calls are when the caller asks you ‘how you’re doing?’, without even introducing themselves first.

It feels like nails on a frozen chalkboard. Very uncomfortable.

Why is a complete stranger calling to ask how I’m doing?

The best response, is “I’m busy”. This icy reply usually catches them off-guard. 🥶

Follow it up with a quick “Thanks. Bye.” and you can usually be rid of the inconvenient caller in seconds. Without even giving them a chance to dive into their pitch.

ProTip: Don’t say this!

But if you’re that cold caller, the last thing you want is to be bounced into the cold.

Increase your chance of success, by never, ever, ever ever ever starting off your call with “How are you today?”

Make it personal. Do your research.

It can be a hard habit to break, but you’ll get much better results if you introduce yourself first, then just get straight to the point with something more like, “Hi. This so-and-so from XYZ Company. I’m calling because….”

Capture your prospect’s attention any way you like.

Just make sure not to dive straight into the unsanctioned “How are you today?” intro.

It’s doomed to fail.


For informative and light-hearted news and views on the world of real estate, follow overwrite.ai on Instagram and LinkedIn, and keep up-to-date with our weekly NewsBites blog.


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The Most Cringeworthy Real Estate “Dad Jokes”

Dad’s Rock! 👨‍🎤🤘.

And not just on Father’s Day.

Even their super-cringe jokes are lovable.

(Note to all – if you’re wincing but still need to hear the punchline, that’s a Dad Joke.)

So sit back, and enjoy some of our worst real estate dad jokes… 


DAD JOKE #1

“What room in your house are zombies most afraid of?

The living room.

DAD JOKE #2

My bread and butter listings are those with finished basements.
They’re my best cellars!


DAD JOKE #3

Did you hear about the only remaining unit in the apartment building?
It was last but not leased.

DAD JOKE #4

“Why does the mortgage broker always eat lunch by himself?

Because he is a loaner.

DAD JOKE #5

“What kind of insects do you WANT to have in your investment property?

Ten-ants.

DAD JOKE #6

“Hey Girl, is your name mortgage?

Because you’ve got my interest.

DAD JOKE #7

Why didn’t the hipster real estate agent show the oceanside mansion?

It was too current.


For informative and light-hearted news and views on the world of real estate, follow overwrite.ai on Instagram and LinkedIn, and keep up-to-date with our weekly NewsBites blog.


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HQ, Hybrid or Home: Flexible working and the new management mindset

Empowering employees to ‘own’ their work and be judged on outcomes rather than inputs could be the key to improving productivity and strengthening engagement in hybrid workforces.

Dan Price, the Seattle CEO known for cutting his own pay to fund increasing the minimum salary at his firm, Gravity Payments, to $70,000 (£56,000), revealed on Twitter last October that he’d asked his employees where they wanted to work. 

The poll he’d asked them to complete offered three options: HQ, hybrid or home. Only 7% wanted to return to the office full time, while 31% preferred hybrid. The remaining 62% wanted to work remotely. 

His response? “Sounds great. Do whatever you want… As a CEO, what do I care? If you get your work done, that’s all that matters.” 

Global Preference to WFM

The results of Price’s survey seem to be roughly in line with the preferences of the global workforce. The latest studies suggest that many employees, having had a taste of remote working, aren’t keen to return to HQ full time, even though this is what many employers would prefer. 

“Our data shows that employees expect to be offered hybrid working. They will leave, or not join an employer in the first place, if that’s not available,”

Nick Gallimore, director of innovation at business software provider Advanced. 

“This poses a major problem for organisations that want to retain key staff. They must think very carefully before, say, proposing pay cuts for remote employees. Such measures look as though they’ll prove deeply unpopular.” 

Remote working: Measuring it up

Such findings suggest that employers could be setting themselves up for a fall if they cling on to the command-and-control approach of office-based work. They also indicate that firms urgently need to find effective new ways to measure remote workers’ contributions. 

A research report published by EY after the UK’s first nationwide Covid lockdown was lifted in 2020, Physical Return and Work Reimagined Study, found that 49% of the 700-plus employers it had polled were already looking to do so.

“As businesses struggle with the great resignation and a battle for talent, shifting to focus on workforce output and satisfaction is a must,”

Nicola Downing, CEO of IT consultancy Ricoh Europe. 

“A more task-based approach empowers people to work flexibly and it shows that they’re trusted to get the job done. Organisations could then look at introducing certain ‘mutual’ hours where colleagues work at the same time in the same place to promote collaboration.” 

A more task-based approach empowers people to work flexibly

Empowering Employees

Good managers not only establish expectations and gives employees a voice in the process; they also help people to understand how their role expectations align with team and organisational objectives.

Price’s reaction to the findings of his poll also highlights the fact that many business leaders have come to accept that much of what a given employee is achieving isn’t apparent from looking at their time sheet. It’s made them realise why there was so much dissatisfaction with the way we worked before the pandemic. 

Engaging with hybrid working means that companies are becoming flatter and more dispersed, with a less visible workforce. Their focus when measuring performance therefore needs to shift to a task-based model of outcomes, such as customer satisfaction or time to market.

Understanding outputs and productivity

The best way for organisations to understand output is to apply high-quality performance management methods, according to Gallimore. He argues that one of the problems afflicting many firms in this respect is a lack of clarity on what outcomes are most important to them and then articulating how each person’s individual goals feed into achieving these. 

“If each employee has clear goals that define expectations of their output and are linked to organisational objectives, this will free the organisation to empower people in terms of where and when they work,” Gallimore says. “This way, measuring output becomes a lot easier. If your process is agile enough, you’ll find that it can really drive that sense of empowerment.”

This is key to the success of an outcome-focused hybrid working policy, he adds. Rather than dictating to people when they need to attend the office, employers can trust them to decide for themselves according to the goals they’re aiming to achieve. 

Gallimore cites the process of inducting new recruits as an example. Although firms’ experiences during the Covid lockdowns have shown that it can be done remotely, many people feel that things can be missed this way, so it’s often better to complete the process in person at HQ. Under an outcome-focused approach, this is a tangible task that can be left up to a manager and their team to choose where and when to do it, leaving other stakeholders in the organisation to judge how successful that decision was. 

Sheela Subramanian is co-founder and vice-president of the Future Forum, a research consortium backed by Slack Technologies.

She believes that:

“It’s critical that leaders move from activity to outcomes when measuring performance. The first step is being really clear with your team by defining what ‘good’ looks like. This will be a mix of quantitative and qualitative outcomes. There can be potential for ambiguity when one balances the two, so it’s important for leaders to share examples of success.” 

According to research by Gallup, almost half of all employees start their working day without a clear idea of what they’re expected to achieve. This is quite a troubling finding for an office-based workforce, but it becomes even more problematic in situations where employees are more widely distributed. 

This places even more responsibility on their managers to set clear objectives, according to Dr Adam Hickman, senior workplace strategist at Gallup. 

“Good managers not only establish expectations and gives employees a voice in the process; they also help people to understand how their role expectations align with team and organisational objectives,” he says. “When employees have this sense of purpose, their engagement soars, even when they’re working at a distance.” 

Dr Adam Hickman

Goals also need to be aligned with tangible outcomes to make it crystal-clear to everyone what progress looks like, Hickman adds. 

“Everyone likes to have something to show for their hard work, but this can be especially helpful for hybrid workers when you can’t always see the tasks they complete each day in person,” he says. 

Focusing on outcomes in this way should also help hybrid workers to organise their time better, as they’ll be able to quantify how much work a particular task is likely to require. This should then enable them to achieve a better work/life balance, which will again make for a happier workforce, according to Gallimore. 

Promoting a better work/life balance through hybrid work models

Empowering employees

“What people want from their employer has changed significantly over the past few years. In particular, there’s been a real increase in demand for a better work-life balance,” he says. “By helping employees to clearly understand the outputs that are important to the business, you can free up enough choice around those outputs – for example, where, when and how people prefer to work – to enable them to find the balance they’re looking for.” 

The opportunity to engage with hybrid working not only liberates employees; it frees organisations from the traditional office-hours metric of productivity, which was at best myopic and at worst a serious limiter to business growth and success. 


This column does not necessarily reflect the opinion of overwrite.ai and its owners.

Jon Axworthy writes for Raconteur 

This story has been published from an article on Monday 13th June 2022, without modifications to the text. Only the headline and has been changed.


For informative and light-hearted news and views on the world of real estate, follow overwrite.ai on Instagram and LinkedIn, and keep up-to-date with our weekly NewsBites blog.


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Revealed: 4 Reasons why DUBAI house prices can soften in 2022

Your cab driver’s got one. So does your mother-in-law. Your best friend too. Everyone has an opinion on Dubai house prices.

Here’s mine: I see Dubai house prices softening this year. And here are 4 signals that are flashing red.

#1: Quantitative Tightening

Over a decade of quantitative easing has finally come home to roost. Printing money ad infinitum led to excess liquidity, and plenty of free lunch. But we all know there’s no such thing.

At a recent event JPMorgan Chase CEO Jamie Dimon, the world’s #1 banking CEO, said “Several aspects of quantitative easing programs “backfired,” including negative rates, which he called a “huge mistake.”

Central banks “don’t have a choice because there’s too much liquidity in the system,” Dimon said, referring to the tightening actions. “They have to remove some of the liquidity to stop the speculation, reduce home prices and stuff like that.”

#2: Interest Rate Increases

If by now you haven’t got the message that the Federal Reserve bank of the United States is increasing interest rates by at least another 2% this year, what rock have you been hiding under?

Anyone thinking the impact of this will simply be a few additional hundred dollars a month on a mortgage repayment, might want to reconsider; Car loans. Personal loans. And credit card debt. It all adds up.

The argument that prices are shielded by cash purchases in Dubai’s luxury residential real estate segment, isn’t good enough. The majority of middle-income homeowners have mortgage financed their property purchases.

How long can the average family contend with the increased costs of consumer goods, loans and fuel?

Expect a chunk of middle-income households to be tipped into debt burdens they can’t comfortably keep up with. To reduce their monthly obligations, they’ll sell properties.

That will introduce more supply to the market at a time when developers are in full swing, putting downward pressure on prices up and down the price spectrum.

#3: Replacement Costs

When the cost of buying a secondary market home is equal to or less than the cost of building the same home from the ground up; don’t think. Buy the home that’s ready to move into. Immediate utility. No-brainer.

China’s zero-covid tolerance policy. Inflated costs of labour and materials. Broken supply chains. All have compounded the cost of building, causing the price of new homes to increase. That’s lifted demand for ready homes. Values have risen.

What happens as those costs ease? US President Joe Biden’s plan to fix supply chain issues and reduce trade tariffs with China are designed to tackle inflation run amok. And with China finally reopening, raw material prices are going to drop.

Expect the cost of construction to ease, dragging down the value of ready homes.

#4: King Dollar and Prince Dirham

I’ve said it time and again.

As US interest rates increase, so too do the values of the US Dollar and the Dirham. Causing demand for Dubai housing to ease, and prices to soften.

The contention that many investors aren’t deterred by higher purchase costs, ignores fundamental economic rules of thumb. That investors behave rationally.

Bubbles Be Poppin’

Those who know me, know that I’ve had skin in the Dubai real estate game for the past 20 years. I believe in Dubai. Its resilience. Its leadership. The proactive nature of its residents. And it’s X-Factor. That Wild Card that continues to pull demand.

If there’s one thing I’ve learned about property investment, and Dubai in particular; you make your money when you buy. It’s all in the timing.

This week I closed my Dubai property portfolio. Sold my investment properties and equities.

Volatile, speculative asset classes like Cryptos and NFTs are already collapsing. Equity markets are being challenged. Real estate isn’t immune. It’s merely a matter of time.

I expect values to soften as we exit 2022, or by early 2023. But rather than a hard crash, we can look forward to a soft landing. I’ll be ready to dive back in when buy signals flash green again. Then I’ll buy a very specific property at Serenia Living on the Palm Island Jumeirah, where demand is inelastic.


An AI Implementation Strategist accredited by the prestigious MIT in Cambridge, Massachusetts, Ayman Alashkar also has a BSc in Mathematics from the world-renowned Queen Mary College, University of London, and an MSc in Real Estate Investment and Development from the University of Reading (UK). With +20 years’ experience working in real estate, banking and artificial intelligence, Ayman is the founder and CEO of overwrite.ai.


For informative and light-hearted news and views on the world of real estate, follow overwrite.ai on Instagram and LinkedIn, and keep up-to-date with our weekly NewsBites blog.


overwrite.ai | the AI writing assistant for estate agents | Sign up for your Free 7 Day Trial.

World #1 Bank CEO says ‘brace yourself’ for an Economic Hurricane

JPMorgan Chase CEO Jamie Dimon says he is preparing the biggest U.S. bank for an economic hurricane on the horizon and advised investors to do the same.

“You know, I said there’s storm clouds but I’m going to change it … it’s a hurricane,” 

Jamie Dimon – CEO JPMorgan Chase

Dimon, speaking at a financial conference in New York on Wednesday, says that while conditions seem “fine” at the moment, nobody knows if the hurricane is “a minor one or Superstorm Sandy”.

You’d better brace yourself,” Dimon told the roomful of analysts and investors. “JPMorgan is bracing ourselves and we’re going to be very conservative with our balance sheet.”

Stocks have been hammered as investors prepare for the end of the Federal Reserve’s cheap money era. Inflation at multidecade highs, exacerbated by supply chain disruptions and the coronavirus pandemic, has sown fear that the Fed will inadvertently tip the economy into recession as it combats price increases.  


KEY POINTS

  • There are two main factors that has Dimon worried: So-called quantitative tightening, or QT, is scheduled to begin this month and will ramp up to $95 billion a month in reduced bond holdings.
  • The other large factor worrying Dimon is the Ukraine war and its impact on commodities, including food and fuel. Oil could hit $150 or $175 a barrel, he said.
  • “You’d better brace yourself,” Dimon told the roomful of analysts and investors. “JPMorgan is bracing ourselves and we’re going to be very conservative with our balance sheet.”

While stocks bounced from a precipitous decline in recent weeks on optimism that inflation may be easing, Dimon seemed to dash hopes that the bottom is in.

“Right now, it’s kind of sunny, things are doing fine, everyone thinks the Fed can handle this,” Dimon said. “That hurricane is right out there, down the road, coming our way.”

There are two main factors that has Dimon worried: First, the Federal Reserve has signaled it will reverse its emergency bond-buying programs and shrink its balance sheet. The so-called quantitative tightening, or QT, is scheduled to begin this month and will ramp up to $95 billion a month in reduced bond holdings.

“We’ve never had QT like this, so you’re looking at something you could be writing history books on for 50 years,” Dimon said. Several aspects of quantitative easing programs “backfired,” including negative rates, which he called a “huge mistake.”

Central banks “don’t have a choice because there’s too much liquidity in the system,” Dimon said, referring to the tightening actions. “They have to remove some of the liquidity to stop the speculation, reduce home prices and stuff like that.”

The other large factor worrying Dimon is the Ukraine war and its impact on commodities, including food and fuel. Oil “almost has to go up in price” because of disruptions caused by the worst European conflict since World War II, potentially hitting $150 or $175 a barrel, Dimon said.

“Wars go bad, [they] go south in unintended consequences,” Dimon said. “We’re not taking the proper actions to protect Europe from what’s going to happen to oil in the short run.”

‘Huge Volatility’

Last week, during an investor conference for his bank, Dimon referred to his economic concerns as “storm clouds” that could dissipate. Presentations from Dimon and his deputies at the all-day meeting have bolstered JPMorgan shares by giving greater detail on investments and updated figures on interest revenue.

But his concerns seem to have deepened since then.

During the response to the 2008 financial crisis, central banks, commercial banks and foreign exchange trading firms were the three major buyers of U.S. Treasurys, Dimon said Wednesday. The players won’t have the capacity or desire to soak up as many U.S. bonds this time, he warned.

“That’s a huge change in the flow of funds around the world,” Dimon said. “I don’t know what the effect of that is, but I’m prepared for, at a minimum, huge volatility.”

One step the bank could take to gird itself for a coming hurricane is to push clients to move a type of lower-quality deposit called “non-operating deposits” into other places, such as money market funds, for example. That would help the bank manage its capital requirements under international rules, potentially helping it absorb a surge in bad loans.

“With all this capital uncertainty, we’re going to have to take actions,” Dimon said. “I kind of want to shed nonoperating deposits again, which we can do in size, to protect ourselves so we can serve clients in bad times. That’s the environment we’re dealing with.”

Banks having a “fortress balance sheet” and conservative accounting are the best protections for a downturn, Dimon said.

The bank has shied away from servicing a lot of federal FHA loans, he said, because delinquencies could hit 5% or 10% there, “which is guaranteed to happen in a downturn,” Dimon said.

‘Shame on you’

Dimon went on a tear during the hourlong session, barreling through topics like a “greatest hits” of his observations and gripes, often letting loose with profanity.

He lambasted investors for voting along with proxy advisors like Glass Lewis, which has disagreed with JPMorgan’s board on recent matters including executive compensation and whether the bank should separate the chairman and CEO roles in the future.

“Shame on you if that’s how you vote,” Dimon said. “Seriously, you should be embarrassed. Do your own homework.”

Companies are being driven out of public markets “because of litigation, regulation, press, cookie-cutter governance,” he added.  

Meanwhile, other critics often conflate stakeholder capitalism for being “woke,” Dimon said.  “I am a red-blooded, free market capitalist and I’m not woke,” he said.

“All we’re saying is when we wake up in the morning, we give a s— about serving customers, earning their respect, earning their repeat business.”


This column does not necessarily reflect the opinion of overwrite.ai and its owners.

Hugh Son writes for CNBC

This story has been published from an article on Wednesday 1st June 2022, without modifications to the text. Only the headline and has been changed.


For informative and light-hearted news and views on the world of real estate, follow overwrite.ai on Instagram and LinkedIn, and keep up-to-date with our weekly NewsBites blog.


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THIS ARTICLE WILL SAVE YOU $$$’s.

Three weeks ago I commented on the Dollar Index breaking past the psychological 100 resistance level on an unchallenged path to 101.

Less than a month later, King 👑 Dollar’s now reached 20 year highs. Most major currencies have been crushed in its path. Such is the current scale of market risk-off sentiment. 

Besides soaring mortgage rates, treasury rates and high volatility; comes the drain on “perceived” wealth and trading income from the stock markets. A combined formula with significant slowdown effect on the economy. All this with only 2 hikes of 75bps total (so far).

Nael Mustafa – CIO Real Estate at GFH Financial Group

What’s this all mean?

Forget the 2008 Global Financial Crisis. Forget the peak-fear of Covid in early 2020. 

The Dollar’s now at levels not seen since the systemic uncertainty that took hold in the aftermath of 9/11. 

How’s this relevant to Dubai Real Estate?

In simple terms, the more expensive the dollar, (and therefore the Dirham), the less attractive Dubai Real Estate as an asset class. Demand…decreases.

To put this in perspective, at the time of writing, UK #Sterling and Indian #Rupee denominated investors had to respectively pay nearly 7% and 2% more to buy Dirhams, than they did 3 weeks prior.

That means the same property, asking the same price, now costs more for a buyer from Manchester or Mumbai.

How long the dollar stays high is unclear. It’s taking a breather, having been heavily overbought.

But its path of least resistance is north. Expect it to re-attack 105. 

Pro Tips:

For short term traders. If you have any Dollar or Dirham liquidity, wait for 105 and sell your assets. Repatriate the proceeds into your native currencies, banking the capital appreciation and FX upsides. Double-whammy! 

For long term Dubai Real Estate landlords. Expect the market to switch, from seller’s favour to buyer’s favour. But don’t panic. Jerome Powell & Co are doing a great job at managing market expectations. And locally; Dubai’s policy makers are doing everything to make the Dubai Real Estate market more resilient. There is a price correction in the short-term future. But unlike our previous cycles, this time we can expect a soft-landing.


An AI Implementation Strategist accredited by the prestigious MIT in Cambridge, Massachusetts, Ayman Alashkar also has a Bachelors Degree in Mathematics from the world-renowned Queen Mary College, University of London, and a Masters in Real Estate Investment and Development from the University of Reading (UK). With +20 years’ experience working in real estate, banking and artificial intelligence, Ayman is the founder and CEO of overwrite.ai.


For informative and light-hearted news and views on the world of real estate, follow overwrite.ai on Instagram and LinkedIn, and keep up-to-date with our weekly NewsBites blog.


overwrite.ai | the AI writing assistant for estate agents | Sign up for your Free 7 Day Trial.

Your Property Descriptions Are BORING! Let’s Fix That.

There’s a growing problem with online real estate marketing. And it’s your problem.

Anyone that’s spent more than a minute browsing one of the UAE’s real estate portals, will know that it’s full of cookie cutter listings of cookie cutter properties.

What’s worse. Many of them are phishing ads.

Consumers are bored of your content.

You’re paying thousands every month, to publish listings that nobody spends time reading. The portals don’t care. They’re taking your money. So who’s the sucker?

Copy. Paste. Repeat.

It’s no different on social media. The same photos. Captions. And hashtags. Bland as a block of concrete.

Check out these examples.

A Personal Favourite

One strapline that could claim the title of most overused real estate statement ever, is:

“Arguably the best deal on the market…”.

Said Every Real Estate Agent, Everywhere.

Real Estate agents can’t get enough of this phrase.

We’re not saying it’s completely off-limits. But when you really want your property listing to work for you, you’ve got to stand out from the crowd. “Amazing”. “One of a kind”. “Arguably the best”. They’re all so Meh! 😐

You need to Boss-Level your listing content.

While fly-through videos and professional imagery is attractive, remember one fact. You can’t publish a listing with videos and images alone.

You need the…

…Power of Words

Words have power. Their meaning crystallizes perceptions that shape our beliefs, drive our behaviour, and ultimately, create our world. Their power arises from our emotional responses when we read, speak, or hear them.

Harness that power.

Grab your audience’s attention and don’t let go. Make them want you to tell them more about your property.

Here’s how to use Power Words That Pop!

Better than the alternative?

Ditch the dull. Dump the dreary.

Be passionate. You’re not submitting an MBA class paper. Genuine emotion will get you far in this business.

For example, instead of “Best in class“, use

  • Top-drawer
  • Venerable
  • Un-frigging-believable

Try interesting synonyms.

Instead of “Great“, use

  • Must-have/must-read/must-try
  • Winning
  • Crushes it

See where we’re going with this?

Jazz up your intros. For example, instead of “XXXX Agency is proud to introduce…?” – (God how boring!), use:

  • Warning! This property elicits postcode envy.
  • This place brims with positive energy.
  • You can skip over this property, but you’ll be the one kicking yourself later for it.

Hook words

Get creative. Sprinkle these into your listing descriptions and chances are you’ll hit a chord with your audience.

  • A kitchen that’s perfect for releasing your inner gourmet guru.
  • A property with skyline views that’ll take your breath away.
  • An infinity pool that you didn’t know you needed.

Or don’t bother.

Save yourself all that hassle. And get yourself signed up to overwrite.ai | The AI Writing Assistant for Real Estate Agents.

Looking for more creative ways to reach out to your audience? You’re in luck.

Because at overwrite.ai, we love words.

In fact, we’ve created overwrite.ai so you can drop the thesaurus completely.

Our AI Writing Assistant’s powered by a database of over 70,000 entries. Trending words, phrases, and descriptive prose. The cream of the crop of real estate lexicon. All so that you can publish engaging and search optimised listing descriptions that POP.

So all you have to do is sell (or lease) homes.


For informative and light-hearted news and views on the world of real estate, follow overwrite.ai on Instagram and LinkedIn, and keep up-to-date with our weekly NewsBites blog.


overwrite.ai | the AI writing assistant for estate agents | Sign up for your Free 7 Day Trial.

What’s Elon Musk’s Next Twitter Move?

Elon Musk has just spent a mind-blowing $44 Billion on acquiring Twitter. 

The Deal of the Year needs no introduction. 

Twitter, arguably the internet’s most influential social media platform, is under the control of the world’s richest person. 

And he’s now considering monetising it for commercial users.

“I (sic) want to make Twitter better than ever by enhancing the product with new features, making the algorithms open source to increase trust, defeating the spam bots, and authenticating all humans.”

Elon Musk , Twitter Post

But forget all that.

The real question is, will Elon give Donald Trump a Twitter Board Seat?

Elon Musk ‘vehemently opposed Twitter
banning Donald Trump’

Have your say….

Take a second to tell us what you think, or hope, will happen…


For informative and light-hearted news and views on the world of real estate, follow overwrite.ai on Instagram and LinkedIn, and keep up-to-date with our weekly NewsBites blog.


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Revealed: The Lies That Estate Agents Tell

“What wicked webs we weave, when we conspire to deceive”

– Famous Proverb

Real Estate agents are notoriously creative with their facts. It’s part and parcel of the job.

But sadly, there are those who’ll go further. Bending the truth to breaking point. Lying through their teeth to close a deal.

In a recent blog, we listed 6 signs of a bad real estate broker.

Now, we reveal some of the bare-faced lies that wicked estate agents are prepared to tell.

Continue reading “Revealed: The Lies That Estate Agents Tell”

Demand Outpaces Supply for Dubai’s Super Prime Homes

Appetite for Dubai luxury residential units among investors and homeowners is hitting an all-time high.

From 2021 to date, luxury residences by all major developers in Dubai have been fully sold out, and are now trading at a premium on the secondary market.

This is a marked difference from what was witnessed during the Covid pandemic.

At the height of the pandemic, every luxury residential unit worth more than $1 million was considered by many brokers to be a burden on the real estate market in Dubai, and premium properties were barely selling.

During Covid, Dubai turned into a predominately buyer’s market. In 2020 and 2021, most investors adopted a buy-to-let model, purchasing small-scale, low-ticket units in bulk to achieve a higher return on investment.

Tourism was primarily driven by low-income investors who were more likely to opt for smaller, affordable units.

Post-Covid era sees investor interest increase in luxury properties

With the pandemic coming to an end, all that is changing. More and more people, especially millionaires, are moving to Dubai with their families and investing in holiday homes and permanent residences.

According to New World Wealth, Dubai’s population of high-net-worth individuals (HNWIs) soared to 54,000 HNWIs in June 2021 from 52,000 in December 2020, achieving a growth of 3.8 percent.


This column does not necessarily reflect the opinion of overwrite.ai and its owners.

Author, Anup Oommen, is a Middle East Journalist and Digital Editor for Arabian Business

This story has been published without modifications to the text. Only the headline and cover image has been changed.


For informative and light-hearted news and views on the world of real estate, follow overwrite.ai on Instagram and LinkedIn, and keep up-to-date with our weekly NewsBites blog.


overwrite.ai | the AI writing assistant for estate agents | Sign up for your Free 7 Day Trial.

6 Signs of a Bad Real Estate Broker

Bad Real Estate Agents. Unfortunately they’re out there. There are those that lack training. Those with limited experience. Poor local community knowledge. Zero negotiation skills. Pushy sales techniques.

Not every agent is a bad apple. Many are ethical, informed and professional. Genuinely intent on finding the best possible outcome for their clients.

So, what makes a Bad Agent?

Continue reading “6 Signs of a Bad Real Estate Broker”

A Wave Of Billion-Dollar Language AI Startups Is Coming

Language is at the heart of human intelligence. It is the basis of our communication. It is therefore at the heart of our efforts to build artificial intelligence. No sophisticated AI can exist without mastery of language.

And the field of language AI—also referred to as natural language processing, or NLP—has undergone breathtaking advances over the past few years.

We now stand at an exhilarating inflection point in human history.

Where Language AI is poised to make the leap from academic research, to widespread real-world adoption. Generating billions of dollars of value, and transforming entire industries in the process.

Continue reading “A Wave Of Billion-Dollar Language AI Startups Is Coming”

Beckham bites on Coulthard’s donut 🍩

Every once in a while an idea comes along that you wish you’d thought of.

In this case it was the perfect combination. Sizzling-hot, super-prime real estate. Two of (arguably) the world’s most legendary A-list sport celebs. And a phenomenal piece of dare-devil stunt marketing.

In possibly one of the craziest real estate launch stunts ever performed, Formula One racing legend David Coulthard took to the top of the Miami’s tallest residential tower to spin some donuts – 700-feet off the ground!

And to top it off, fellow sporting superstar David Beckham dropped a cool US $20M on a full-floor penthouse in the Zaha Hadid designed building. 

Continue reading “Beckham bites on Coulthard’s donut 🍩”

Explained: The Pros & Cons of Real Estate Crowdfunding

Hark the (re)emergence of the Real Estate Crowdfunding Platform.

Real Estate Crowdfunding isn’t new. The concept’s been around for over a decade. Although now it’s enjoying a re-birth during this age of post-pandemic excess liquidity.

Let’s start at the beginning.

What is Real Estate Crowfunding? It’s the ability for retail investors (Mr or Mrs Smith) to invest nominal sums towards a direct real estate asset acquisition, via a platform that manages the transaction, the financing, and the asset, in exchange for a fee.

In plain English, ‘Invest in property for as little as $500‘.

These soundbites may sound sexy, but they’re often misleading. So together let’s take a closer look at the Pros and Cons of real estate crowdfunding:

The Pros – Why to crowdfund a real estate investment?

Access All Areas

The biggest benefit of real estate crowdfunding is access to dealflow.

Some years back I participated in a crowdfunded acquisition of a commercial property on London’s Oxford Street. The deal proposed that investors would earn an income yield of 2.15% (net of fees) and an IRR of 13% from the value uplift that was explained within the investment pitch. It was a 4-hear hold. I’ll tell you how it went, further down this article.

Point is, the deal was fully subscribed. Investors like me, who’d have never otherwise had the chance to participate in an Oxford Street commercial property acquisition, piled in. Access.

Small Tickets to Big Plays

Real estate is traditionally a very lumpy asset class. It takes a large amount of capital to buy a property, and ties up that money for the duration of your holding period.

Crowdfunding real estate can be done with small tickets. Enabling investors to participate in big real estate investment plays, without needing to have, or indeed lock-up, large sums of equity for long periods of time.

Liquidity – Getting your money out.

Direct real estate ownership is when you directly own a property in your name. Like your house.

Crowdfunding real estate is not direct asset ownership. It’s indirect. You will own shares in companies that are set up to buy and own the properties directly. Those shares can be sold to the other shareholders of the company, or to third party investors, via the crowdfunding platform’s internal marketplace, without the need to sell the property. Making your ability to get your money out, easier. More liquid.

Diversification

Crowdfunding investors can distribute their capital across an array of property types and sectors. That’s investment theory 101. Spread risk out strategically, across a diversified range of properties. Instead of putting equity into a residential rental investment.

Invest across a basket of residential, commercial, and retail properties. Each with their own economic and tactical opportunities.

The Cons – Why not to real estate crowdfund?

Fees

Where direct real estate investment puts you in the driver’s seat. Indirect crowdfunded investment leaves you, the retail investor, reliant on the platform you’re investing through, to manage your investment and the property. They’re putting this deal together from beginning to end. And they’re going to charge a fee.

Whether they charge a stack of them; like a sourcing fee, an admin fee, an early-exit fee, or a carry… Or they roll their remuneration into a single, seemingly innocuous ‘Administrative’ fee. The platform you’re investing through is clipping a slice of your investment for themselves, before you see a penny.

Illiquidity

Promoting crowdfunded real estate platforms on the basis of their liquidity sounds nice in theory. You’ll be told you can sell your shares in the company that owns the property, fast. And get your money out with little administrative hassle. But read the fine print.

  1. There might be a minimum lock-in period during which you can’t exit your capital.
  2. It’s not uncommon for a crowdfunding platform to demand the right of first refusal to buy your shares. Not a bad thing, but it won’t pay full value for them.
  3. Often the platform will give themselves the authority to approve (or reject) any buyer for your shares that you might find on the secondary market.

Any one of these conditions, creates illiquidity. So read up on your chosen platform’s T&C’s. Know your rights.

The Unspoken Upside

Here’s the dirty little secret that crowdfunding platforms don’t want you to hear.

Before it can offer a property to its crowd of investors, a platform needs to source and secure it.

To do that, the platform either buys the property outright and flips it to the crowd. Or locks in the right to buy it at a price, then secures the crowd funding for it, at a higher price.

In both cases there’s a markup. A delta, between the price the platform secures the property for, and the price it pitches it to its crowd at.

That difference is an upfront upside, that the platform keeps for itself. It’s an immediate profit that’s coming out of your investment’s bottom line. An ethical crowdfunding platform should declare the property’s true acquisition price, source a deal for its crowd at no profit, and justifiably charge a sourcing fee for its troubles.

Beware of any platform that does not declare the true purchase price of its properties to its crowd. Especially if they’re also charging a sourcing fee. Big red flag. 🟥

The Waterfall

Remember that deal on London’s Oxford Street that I invested in years back? The one that promised a 13% IRR? Guess what ended up happening with it.

The distribution of returns didn’t play out as the platform had proposed in their pitch.

The pitch was based on a rental income uplift to be gained, from a lease renewal that was due during the investment holding period. That renewal ran into trouble. Negotiations between the property manager and tenant dragged out. Lawyers got involved. Legal fees skyrocketed. The platform didn’t distribute dividends as they’d promised. After 4 years, what was supposed to have been an IRR of 13% ended up closer to 7%.

This despite all the ‘professional’ opinions (from lawyers, property professionals etc..) that the pitch had cited at the start.

The sting in the tail is that when you’re a retail investor, sh*t falls down. It’s not the platform that’s at the bottom of the totem pole. It’s you.

The platform’s banked its upfront upside. It’s been paid all its administrative fees. All it’s got to lose is its carry fee. That’s the fee they get if things go as well as, or even better than planned. Think of it like a performance bonus.

The platform’s banked its upfront upside. It’s been paid all its administrative fees. All it’s got to lose is its carry fee. That’s the fee they get if things go as well as, or even better than planned. Think of it like a performance bonus.

But let’s face it. Things don’t always go to plan. And when it hits the fan, the only one losing…is you. Because here’s the thing about being an indirect, retail investor. You’re too small to matter. In the cascading waterfall of profit distribution, you’re last in the queue.

Let’s Wrap This Up

So, is real estate crowdfunding a good investment?

If you want to diversify your portfolio. Get in on property deals you otherwise can’t access. Put smalls sums of capital to work. Then sure. Give it a go.

BUT…read up. Know who you’re investing through and the conditions of your investment. Be aware that the platform you’re investing through is carrying little or no risk on the trade. And that they will make more profit from your money, than you will.


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This Negotiation Tactic Will Fail You

Every business person knows that feeling of putting time into negotiating deals. The art of convincing a counterparty. The excitement of getting a deal to its final stage. The elation of success. The celebration.

But success isn’t always the outcome. In fact, more often than not, deals fall flat in a heap of disappointment and wasted time.

And this one negotiating tactic that many people mistakenly use, is almost always guaranteed to throw their deal from the outset.

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